MODESTY

Let’s face it. Immodesty is a problem in our culture and right here in our church. Let me give you an example. Each year when we go over the dress code for our mission trips there is a reaction against the seemingly ridiculous nature of the dress code. If we think it is a little overboard, then maybe it should cause us to ask if we are the ones that have gone overboard with immodesty. Guys are not allowed to go without shirts when it is hot, which usually brings some objection. Girls usually object even further since they cannot wear things like tank tops, spaghetti straps, shorts less than fingertip length. The reason we are not allowed to dress this way is because the mission agencies have said it is offensive to the culture we are going to. It isn’t only in Jamaica either. It was true in Philly. The particular reason why it is that way in Philly is because that is the way the hookers dress and they don’t want our girls to be propositioned!

The problem is for both guys and girls. Guys know how to dress to attract girls. Guys also have modesty issues in showing their boxers by wearing their pants too low. However, the problem is far greater with girls. This is primarily because of the difference in the way guys and girls are wired. Guys are affected more by visual stimuli whereas girls are more affected by touch. Perhaps the way guys contribute most to immodesty is by giving undue attention to those who are seeking it. They contribute to it by expecting it and favoring those who dress immodestly.

So why is it that we are so quick to defend our choices of dress? And why does our immodesty enter into church on Sunday? I have had married men in the church ask me to address this issue because they think some of our students dress immodestly. When other people are distracted from worship on Sunday then this is a serious problem.

1 Timothy 2:9-10 says, “I also want women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or expensive clothes, but with good deeds, appropriate for women who profess to worship God.” These particular instructions are given as Paul writes to Timothy about worship. Women are to dress decently. Why? Because to dress excessively highlights the difference between those who have more and those who don’t have as much, but also because that is the way the temple prostitutes used to dress.

Dressing modestly is a matter of honoring God in every part of our lives! For the glory of God and honor of Christ, modesty should be expressed every day of the week, especially on the Lord’s Day. 1 Timothy 4:12 says, “Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.”

You do have an impact on others. Make no mistake about it. My kids are always talking about the high school and middle school students and trying to act like and dress like them. So set a good example for them. You who are members have a duty to all the younger children in the church because as their families come here you have agreed to help nurture their children and point them to Christ. Are you setting good examples or bad ones?

Girls, let me give some very practical advice that I’ve learned from other Christian leaders. One of our students visited California a few months ago. In a particular church the youth pastor spoke about this subject. One of the remarks he made was that “girls need to quit stealing their t-shirts from 3 year olds.” Clothes are meant to conceal not reveal—both skin and shape. Your clothes reveal your sexual limits. What you wear communicates to a guy what you would like him to do with you. Whether you like it or not, that’s the way it is. The greater problem in our culture today is that most girls know this and it is exactly what they want! Please, do not seek attention in that way. Do you know that the Lord Jesus loves you so much more deeply and gives you every ounce of his attention to show his love to you? Do you know you had his attention when he was nailed to the cross?

Guys, let me give you some practical advice. Don’t encourage immodest dress by flirting with those who seek it. 1 Timothy 5:2 says, “Treat…younger women as sisters, with absolute purity.” Do you guys think of those here as your sisters? Treat girls with absolute purity!

This battle for modesty in our culture cannot only be fought in our schools (though I am thankful for it). Nor can it only be fought in our church (though it must be). It must be fought in your households and in the minds of your children. It will require your effort because children face temptation every day to conform to our culture instead of being transformed by the renewing of their minds. You have the greatest influence on your children and you can influence their shopping habits, especially when it is your money! Please take great care in teaching your children about godly living. Teach them to love God’s law. God’s rules and standards are not meant to hurt or harm us. They are meant for the exact opposite—to provide us with healthy well-being and happiness in Him. He made the world and knows how we can best enjoy it.

To ask for modesty is simply asking for a measure of decency.

All For Jesus,

Andrew Conrad, Youth Pastor

“Take great care in teaching your children about godly living.”